Warm and cool
Barely there
Like kissing clouds
Sun’s fingers in my hair
Pounding silence
Rushes everywhere.
Days of Summer
In the Fall
Take my breath away
And cushion it all
Joy whispers softly
Yet I hear the call.
A new love grows
Deep in my heart
For this Autumn
Has had a gentle start
Easing the loss
As Summer departs.
With a stiff little neck
Feeling cramped and alone
The time has come
To leave the safe zone.
What was needed to protect
Is eventually outgrown
Becoming a barrier
To a full life of her own.
With no hesitation
Not full of fears
With no crippling words
Filling her ears.
The baby bird,
Far beyond me,
Breaks through the shell
To fly and be free.
It’s okay she takes a rest
All along the way
That tough exterior
Wasn’t built in a day.
And once she’s out
She’s an ugly mess
Vulnerable and weak
And all out of breath.
But there’s the nest
Made with love and care
To hold her gently
As long as she’s there.
Gathering strength and courage
Being fed bits of food
She realizes soon
There’s more than this, too.
Trembling slightly
Up on the edge
She leaps with faith
Toward what’s up ahead.
Never wondering or worrying
What will happen if she does
The beautiful bird soars
Filled with joy, all abuzz.
Profound and magical
What can be
When we embrace God’s gifts
Wholeheartedly.
Taken by surprise
All these tears left to cry.
After all this time
I don’t understand why.
A bizarre time warp
I feel all the same ways
When grief came in waves
day after day.
Two years sounds so short
or maybe long?
It really doesn’t matter.
Either way, he’s gone.
Gone, gone, gone.
I desperately wish
for one more kiss
one more hug
and an “I love you, Sis.”
I want to believe
I’ll see him again
and we’ll rush to each other
like long lost friends.
Maybe it will happen.
I don’t know.
But today my heart breaks
and the mending is slow.
I love you, Dad
and I miss you so.
Found the sweetest spot
with my man
Sheltered by dune grass
in the cool night sand.
Blissfully alone
though people all around
A stolen moment
we gratefully found.
The stars shining bright
reflect the twinkle in his eye
And I remember I love him
with a long, lovely sigh.
All the way home
a light glows in his face
It matches the one
that fills my heart’s space
And I pray God forever leads us
back to this place.
The sweetest spot
in the cool night sand
sheltered by dune grass
With my man.
My biggest holes
I’ve come to see
in the mirror of relationship
between you and me.
And I’m beginning to love
those empty places
No longer wanting others
to fill in the spaces.
Those yawning gaps
of varying degrees
Give me room to grow
to become more me.
The fear of knowing
my deepest self
Replaced with love and truth
the whole of spiritual health.
My apologies, forgiveness
gratitude and love
Pour forth from my soul
on the wings of a dove.
So I’ll think of you always
with a thankful heart
and all the special blessings
that were here from the start.
Like a giant water bug
out of slow moving water
Finding my way
a long lost daughter.
I feel the pull
of the stars, sun and moon
Following them
I should be home soon.
With celestial navigation
I know right where I am
I head for the sky
fear be damned.
Is there a better pond
where still waters aren’t so deep?
So still I can’t see
the truths that I keep.
Might I also find
the perfect mate
with whom vibrant life
I can create?
Beacons of light
to orient my flight
Exhilarating to escape
stagnant waters at night.
I fly and fly
with all my might
A little disoriented
but sure this is right.
Not knowing my sights
are actually set
On an ordinary street lamp
false aide to abet.
Around and around I spiral
toward the artificial light
Much too close
and much too bright.
Exhausted I fall
from a life of aimless flying
After all that effort
I can’t believe I’m dying.
Where did I go wrong?
What’s really true?
Was the seeking a mistake?
Or the path that I flew?
If by some miracle
I happen to survive
Should I return to my pond?
Or give it another try?
Can I trust my knowing
of what is love and truth?
Or will more brightly lit paths
lead me away from You?
One afternoon
Weary and rue
Not quite sick
with not quite the flu
A call came in
quite out of the blue
A miracle
I was there for you.
The sweetest sentiments
I long wished to hear
Sailed a beam of light
from your mouth to my ears.
Forever to be held
in my heart, my dear.
You said I want you to know
that I’ll always be here.
Your smallest worries
I pray to clear.
I wanted to be with you
all these years.
And my spirit was as happy
as a child of three
Giggling and laughing
perched upon your knee.
Face full of joy
as you hold onto me.
Past the lump in my throat
And the tears that I’ve cried
The truth wrenched free
from the silencing lies.
Taking a leap
I let it fly.
I’m so glad
I said it, too.
These words I’ve held
so long for you
Enter my life.
I love you.
Sifting through the sands of time
Panhandling for golden moments
Really? This is it?
A few shinning nuggets among the sediments?
But maybe if I let go
of my preconceived notions
Of what is gold
and what is just commotion
Or lumps of coal
from life’s misfortunes.
Might there be
with a touch of the Stone
The richest riches
man has ever known?
The depths within me
and without
Would unite together
banishing doubt.
With new eyes opened
I could wash away the silt
And see a Heaven on earth
that surely can be built.
Words of wisdom
fused with love
Might delight my soul
and move my body as a dove.
And in the final battle
If all went right
I’d see God everywhere
And my pan full of Light.
My mind plays tricks on me
Taking clues from my heart
Breathing life into my hopes and dreams
Carefully wrapped shimmering works of art
Laughing merrily
Until it all falls apart.
Wide-eyes gazing upon the wonders
Miracles float and dance before me
Drawing close despite so many blunders
Deepest yearning for it truly to be.
No longer able to maintain poise
Squealing in delight and leaping for joy
Body now moving of its own accord
Hands unbidden gently touch, then greedily hoard.
Dizzily spinning every which way
Catching the ones within my reach
Pop, pop, pop and a fragrant spray
Too fragile, too fragile! Too late I preach.
I can’t have it, no matter what
Either it bursts or floats high above
With a shove and a kick another door slams shut
My mind hugs my heart, so sorry my love.
Then suddenly the truth in me dawns
It was an illusion all along.
Becoming whole
The path of the soul
a lofty dream
because it seems
the richness of life
the joys and the sorrows
the loves and the strife
are sharpest felt
most clearly seen
around the holes
and in betweens.
Holes left, holes made
Holes filled, holes gave
Through them we grow,
I suppose
Becoming whole
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