A Puzzle

A puzzle your words
they are to me.
Often the same
yet still a mystery.

I’ve picked into colorful pieces
all of our conversations
spending hours with jagged bits
lost in ruminations.

And the big pictures
I’m apt to miss
if I continue to focus
on the fragments like this.

So I spread them on the table
under good light
I bend in concentration
and work to fit them right.

I always start with the frame
but this puzzle has no boundaries
I can’t neatly box it in
With straight edges, smooth and soundly.

There is no lid
to show what I’m trying to make
With so many possibilities
my head begins to ache.

Just tell me what you mean
It’s too hard to make it fit
I’ve studied all night
And I’m ready to quit.

With infinite patience
and kindness to spare
You lay it all out for me
Tidy and square.

Of course, I don’t like the picture
Which is why I couldn’t see
the truths I’m not ready
to have set me free.

One piece at a time
I pull it apart
Arguing each point
I know by heart.

Though now that I’ve viewed it
I can’t erase the scene
I feel change happening slowly
deep inside of me.